Forgetful Me

During this Lent season, I prayed that I would be made painfully aware of my sins and that I would come into true repentance that is pleasing to God. Little did I know that it would come in the form of a student knocking over my new laptop this afternoon. When I realized the damage done, anger and frustration welled up inside me--nearly the same gut-wrenching feeling I got when my phone was stolen from my backpack last fall, when my iPad charger was taken from my desk drawer, and when my candles were burned to the core this week without me knowing.  I felt violated and slapped by injustice. I realized right there just how much value I was placing on earthly possessions. 

" If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. 3 For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. 4 When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory."   

-Colossians 3: 1-4

Thank God for my mother who reminded me, "Cathy, you're not surprised, are you? You went there for missions. You are supposed to be losing things." Keep giving even if you get nothing back. Give grace because you have been shown grace. Forgive. Love. Love even when it hurts to. And that is when I realized how much I lost sight of it all this year. 

So much value was placed on my performance and impact as a second-year teacher, that I've forgotten the joy of loving, of giving, of spending money and time to the excess. I began to cave into the pressures of job performance that I've begun to see my children as a means to an end rather than an end itself. Dear students, forgive me.

Tonight, I praise God for when I forget....He forgives.