Favoritism may be wrong, but this is why sea otters are on the top of my animal list.
Bucket list #1....hold hands with a sea otter.
EDIT----------------
So I just received a text from my parents with the message: "Sea otters. Sea parents. Did you get our picture? Good night baby"
Attached was a picture of my parents in their pjs, holding hands (refer to the video above). HAHAHA. Oy, not going to lie. My parents can be the cutest kids sometimes.
"God never places us in any position in which we cannot grow. We may imagine that He does. We may fear we are so impeded by fretting petty cares that we are gaining nothing;but when we are not sending any branches upward, we may be sending roots downward. Perhaps in the time of our humiliation, when everything seems a failure, we are making the best kind of progress. Look on and look up.Lay hold on Christ with both your poor, empty hands. Let Him do with you what seems good to Him. Though He slay you, still trust in Him, and I dare in His name to promise you a sweeter, better life that you could have ever known, had He left you to drink of the full dangerous cups of unmingled prosperity."
-from "Thoughts Concerning the King" by Elizabeth Prentiss ________________________________________________
I have been meeting frustration after frustration since arriving here this weekend, but it seems like there has been an undesirable but such a necessary lesson behind each one. He's prying my fingers from the things that I have held so dear...in things that I have been trusting in other than Himself. He's exposing the ugliness so deeply embedded inside of me and offering me a chance of renewal.
Lord I come to you. Let my heart be changed...renewed.
As Junior year officially begins tomorrow, I cannot help but sit here by the window and smile at His provisions. The amazing friends who have helped me move in and get settled despite the cost of serving an out-of-state-student friend have also inspired me to further stretch out my hands and receive this invitation that God continues to offer me. He has been providing for me at each "dead end" and has been leaving me in complete awe. May this semester be a year of growth. May this semester bring glory to You.
My brother and I finally pull into the parking lot of a local church. We are meeting the rest of the college group for the special missions service held there that evening. Exasperated by the scorching Texas heat, I frown when my brother forgoes the nice parking spot up front and starts driving toward the empty back rows to park. I turn to him and grumble at the prospect of having to walk the extra distance. My brother smiles and patiently replies, "Let's give the newcomers the good spots."
"The Church is the only society that exists for the benefit of those who are not its members"-William Templeton
Ironically, this point would be further emphasized in the sermon we were going to hear inside. Was I humbled? Yes. I'm such an immature baby sometimes. My life as a Christian shouldn't begin the minute I enter the sanctuary. It starts in the parking lot...from my home, from the moment I wake up and should be the way I live and breath every day. How easily I forget this. Hot weather and a cranky mood certainly do not excuse how I live before God.
Brother, we may share the same sleeping habits and last name, but it's during moments like these when I realize that I'm still such a baby...when our 3-year gap seems light-years apart. I have so much to learn from you sir. So much to learn...
Feeling...uprooted. In a car, rather dark from the Texan summer rays, waiting for the next stop. Right between a smile and a frown. A perfect balance of excitement and nerves.
After being away all summer, I was finally adjusting to life at home when I realized that I'll be packing my bags again and leaving at the end of next week. Oy, junior year...a year in which I'll be forced to make some of those big decisions that I have been so dreading and avoiding. Just thinking about it makes me want to rip my hair out. Wait, I already did that. heh.
My plan for now? Take it step by step. This summer has definitely taught me to cherish each day God gives me and try to learn a little bit more about Him with the time that I have. "The way you live your day is how you live your life," and for now, I just want to know you more.
Uncertain? Yes. Scared? Almost. This summer has been a crazy ride, but God surely has me buckled down. Thank the LORD that He's the one behind the wheel. "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." -Matt. 6:33
I forgot what a sentimental and emotional place an airport can be.
For a long time, I've been on the other end of the terminal, waiting for my flight with other passengers, too tired to care about anything other than finding the right gate, having my boarding pass in my pocket, and keeping an eye on my departure time. I was always leaving, going somewhere.
On Tuesday, I got a taste of what it's like to be on the other side of the sliding doors. You're surrounded by people nervously pacing back and forth, waiting for loved ones to arrive. Some are holding balloons or a fresh bouquet of flowers while others are flipping through a magazine at a nearby concession stand, minus the occasional glance at the clock. After doing a little bit of everything, I ended up waiting by the metal bars with the rest of the crowd, where I witnessed some of life's most precious moments.
I couldn't believe how choked up I got seeing parents embrace children returning from trips overseas and a man embracing his young twins after a business trip. Even the TV screen that kept replaying real reunions between soldiers and their families stirred up something from the pit of my stomach. Eventually, I stood mesmerized, trying to figure out the stories and relationships behind each happy ending that unfolded before my eyes.
After what seemed like forever, it was my turn!
After a year of teaching English in Korea, my brother finally walked through those doors.
By Your Side Why are you striving these days Why are you trying to earn grace Why are you crying Let me lift up your face Just don't turn away
Why are you looking for love Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough To where will you go child Tell me where will you run To where will you run
And I'll be by your side Wherever you fall In the dead of night Whenever you call And please don't fight These hands that are holding you My hands are holding you
Look at these hands and my side They swallowed the grave on that night When I drank the world's sin So I could carry you in And give you life I want to give you life
Cause I, I love you I want you to know That I, I love you I'll never let you go -tenth avenue north
The last time I heard this was during inner city missions in West Philly last summer, but I had a sudden craving to hear this song again just now.
I let my girlie side roam freely in front of chick flicks, but tonight's movie was different. Instead of the happy, fluttery feelings it usually gives me, I found myself numb to its charm and dissatisfied by its "picture-perfect" ending. Don't get me wrong, I'm usually easily won over by cute quotes and romantic story lines, which I'm not always proud of. However, there was something about this one that seemed way too...planned? By the time the credits started rolling, I realized that I was neither wooed nor impressed with the story presented before me. When did I become so critical? so cynical?
Or...did life just make me wiser? Weirdly enough, I kept thinking about the other characters other than the two who finally end up together and hog the spotlight for the entire movie. What about the ones they left behind? Did they find their own happy endings or are they too busy mending their own broken hearts?
For the first time, a chick flick left me feeling empty. lonely. abandoned. forgotten.
Then I felt God whispering His love again for me through this song. I didn't get a chance to spend much time with Him today. I'm so vulnerable. so weak. so easily won over. I realize how much I need His word to constantly protect me, sustain me, fill me. I think now's a good time to delve into something that's more wholesome to my heart. ...something that's more satisfying than fabricated fairytale endings. mm yes, Goodnight<3
Have you ever ached to hug a child you just met a month ago? a week ago?
At first I prayed for some of these beautiful faces by name, but now it's hard to keep track, and I could already feel the names slip through my fingers. I become overwhelmed and anxious, but God graciously reminds me that He knew each child from the beginning of time, thatHe will never forget a single one, and that His Son is constantly interceding for them all. Wow, who do I think I am? It's incredible how attached I can get but how limited my human capacity to love is. Lord, only you. Only you.
So far this summer has been a whirlpool. I'm being sucked into so many things and at times I find myself breathless and exhausted. On the other hand, when I come out of one thing, I'm left thirsty for more. God, you're really giving me a chance to love until I run dry, but You always manage to fill me up again for the next adventure.Each time I feel so weak, helpless, and dependent on You, but somehow I know that this is exactly where You want me to be.
Take me, Mold me Use me, Fill me I give my life to the Potter's hands
Cameroon, Texas, Arizona, neighborhood. I find that kids have a knack for breaking your heart, warming it, then melting it again. Despite the hectic past couple of weeks, I noticed that God has been surrounding me with children...and lots of them. I miss them. The ones who didn't say much and those who could talk until their mouths run dry, those who eagerly followed my praise motions and those who glumly just stared, those who shared their big dreams with me and those who tugged at my braids, those who whispered silly jokes into my ear and those who quietly sat beside me as we enjoyed each other's company. I miss them already. God has been giving me a glimpse of His great love for little ones, whether they're Cameroonian, Korean, Spanish, or Navajo Indian. Yes, they can drive you crazy sometimes, but at the end of the day, when I see how quickly they can bring a smile to my own face,I can only imagine how much our Father prizes them, loves them, and cares for them. I'm thinking of you and praying for you, dear ones. And sadly when I fail you, there's a Father who never will.... "We love because He first loved us." -1 John 4:19
Thank you Daddy for taking me on this incredible journey and showing me how much I need You...for embracing me through these beautiful children and comforting my own heart. I praise you that your love is beyond words, beyond time...that though I may forget them, you never will. I pray that just as you're taking care of me, you continue to water these seeds so that they may grow into fruitful instruments of yours. Please protect them from the evils of this world and fill their lives with the everlasting JOY and hope that is only found in You.
