Resurrection Sunday

 Devoted disciple, what will be your extravagant sacrifice?

Waiting

This has been a season of     w a  i  t   i   n g.

for daddy's health test results.

for job applications.

for phone calls. 

for emails.

for responses.
for answers to prayers.

In all this waiting, I have grown restless--inexplicably so.

In this strangely difficult period of somuchfreetime, God has been teaching me:

1) I am so awful at resting. Not just physically but spirituallymentallyemotionally.

2) I am full of myself and a taste of humble pie once in a while will do me much good.

3) He is worthy of worship--a worship not contingent on my circumstances.

Because while I simply want to do do do,  He simply i s. 

In the crushing cries of rejection and dejection,
I hear His sweet whisper

“Be still, and know that I am God;I will be exalted among the nations,I will be exalted in the earth.”
-Psalm 46:10

Lord, teach me to be still.

So so very still.

September Rain

[Saturday early afternoon]

[gentle whirl of the ceiling fan]

[the quiet static from the radio blending with orchestral harmonies]

It's not until mom puts down her knife on the cutting board

and looks up when I see what catches her sudden attention outside.

The kitchen window starts to blur and I see water droplets already sliding down the screen.

Rain. A drizzle that soon picks up the pace to a steady pouring. 

Mom, still with her apron on, gasps before quickly opening the back door.

Barely getting her sandals on, she rushes out into the falling rain. 

Confused, I call out to her to grab an umbrella. 

Without looking back, she yells, "the neighbor's car window is open. I need to tell them!"

Before I know it, she's already past our lawn and making her way across the street.

Minutes later, she comes back wet and defeated.

No one is home.

My moment of frustration with her getting wet quickly melts as I see her heart.

That moment then turns into a humble rebuke because she has seen what is greater.

I assume she did all she could and expect us to resume our work in the kitchen.

And yet, she is not done. 

She is back in the garage now and rummaging through our items.

Her face lights up when she finds the family tent, and I know what she's thinking.

This time, though, she invites me to join her.

We unzip the bag and unfurl the thin grey waterproof covering. 

We walk back out into the rain and cover the car with our makeshift car blanket.

Excited, we laugh about how confused our neighbors would be upon their arrival.

I look back to see mom, even more drenched in rain, smiling contentedly.

And once again, I'm reminded how blessed I am to call her my mother.

“Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor."
-Romans. 12:10

Clinging On

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, 

so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope." 

-Romans 15:13

En fait, c'est moi.

Seigneur-terraces, French -- 

People who sit in coffee shops for an extended period of time without spending money.

"Kang"isms

Father who...
replaces his toothbrush head with mom's toothbrush head after each use of his Sonicare
murmurs frustration at my coughing and drags my stubborn self to the doctor
unwinds the hose every afternoon to water the plants that mom so dotes upon
surprises his son with a new set of obnoxious boxers after spotting them at the mall
wakes up at ungodly hours and drives his car to church to pray for the family
willingly becomes guinea pig to my mom's senior center dance routines

Mother who...
buys dad an apron to insinuate that she could use a kitchen partner
wraps the peanuts so they don't absorb water from the cut fruit in my lunch container
purchases a set of four gloves to subtly ask for more help in her primitive garden
cooks traditional Korean stew in the baking Texas heat to feed a sick friend
tries to read the name tags of cashiers so she could address them by their names followed by a "dear" (John dear, Tanya dear, Riley dear, etc.)
sleeps in my bed whenever I'm not home

Brother who...
makes his rounds nestling his face into everyone's beds before settling down in his
lays his saxophone case in the puddle so his sister could walk across without getting wet
tucks mom in at night until she's wrapped like a burrito and giggling to no end

goes to drop off a youth student at home and ends up returning after hours of conversation
deposits $20 into sister's bank account and texts her to buy the book she's been eyeing

excitedly brings home a gallon of milk whenever the sister bakes fresh cookies 

Believer

How would you pray if you knew God was listening?

How would you sing if you knew God could hear?